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Butterflies, Flowers & Trees -
6th May 2013

Retreat Preparation

Over a period of three days I recently facilitated a retreat with an amazing woman, a dear friend since 2003. When we met, on a two week Mystery School retreat, Jannine had already been an alternative healing therapist for fifteen years. Jannine has worked with assisting others and still continues mainly through the gift of clairvoyance, readings, and mediumship. A few hours before Jannine arrived and the retreat would officially begin, I drove to the supermarket to buy some supplies necessary to sustain us during the days and nights. The intense soul travelling experience usually has no time frame in regard to the hours required for a morning, afternoon or evening session.

While at the supermarket, I noticed some flowers and immediately thought how nice, especially the bright yellow ones in among the purple and white. I approached the selection only to discover that there was a butterfly, attached also to a long stem sitting right in the middle of the bunch.
On my way home from the supermarket, I decided to have a quick swim in the ocean, ensuring I was in a clear space to begin the retreat. Firstly as I opened my back door, a spider dropped out, it surprised me as I was not expecting such a large creature to appear. Also it had only three legs on one side and one on the other. So must have been caught in the door on a previous occasion. It dropped to the ground and seemed to be well and truly alive as it made its way into the gutter under the car.

As I was about to enter the water, with body board in hand, in haste, due to the big sea, I put my flipper on and broke the rubber strap that sits around my heel. All this happening before the retreat, I began to wonder what was coming over the next few days!

Day One

The retreat 'process' began with activations, very much in the subconscious prior to Jannine's arrival, now beginning to become more conscious. The first night in my Retreat Centre, my home for the past six and a half years, Jannine enjoyed a restful night's sleep, even going back to sleep in the early walking hours where she would normally be 'hitting the floor' and on the move.

The first full day on retreat began with an 'ear candling session' and lasted for approximately three hours. The gift of working more consciously with clair audience, being a significant start to the retreat. The gift is about 'hearing'! Jannine began to travel and connect with the totems, parts of the CrystaLoveLight Body. While there are twenty four in a particular dimension birthing and anchoring, the main ones showing themselves in this particular session included a unicorn, spider and butterfly.

The soul travelling experience throughout the Creation Web of CrystaLoveLight depends on the conscious intention or intentions reflecting a soul's health, relationships or career. The pathways of light, the songlines are mapped and while there are many parts, one is also travelling or shifting through several frequencies. The butterfly or dolphin is of a multi-dimensional nature and therefore may have many parts to this one aspect.

There are many souls, I certainly was one of them, unable to birth and anchor these parts through the I Am. The most conscious door being the physical body, however, if the mental, emotional or several other bodies are holding deep core memories, than these are very challenging to open! A butterfly and many other totems may be seen through the woundedness of what I imagine is similar to their experience in the physical consciousness. Explaining why, many years ago now, I could not continue to be part of a group of people who were volunteer wildlife carers. I was very activated by the woundedness, as well as the death of most animals not surviving their injuries, therefore discontinued this work. My own woundedness had been activated when I began to work with my first mentor and therapist, yet it would be a few years before this understanding became even more conscious.

Day Two

The second full day of Jannine's three day retreat included a trip to a huge crystal warehouse. The primary reason was to purchase a crystal for her friend's birthday, being celebrated in the weeks to come. Several people had given Jannine money towards buying a gift. Of course I knew that this was just a doorway for yet another soul travelling session. The Earth Crystal shop, as it had been on previous occasions for those working over three or more days with me, also have experienced an amazing journey. The size of the shop or warehouse holds an enormous collection of crystals, all shapes and sizes.

We were a couple of hours in this shop and within half an hour I had received a message that Jannine needed some assistance in moving through the mental body. She had obtained the booklet from the shop owner, checking the prices as she had a set amount of money with which to purchase the birthday present.

How I was to get her past this head space and into her heart consciously was both a challenge but of no surprise how it all unfolded. I asked Jannine to stand in front of a tall cupboard with several shelves, two of them had crystal butterflies and through this consciousness the journey through the stars began. Her openness to the 'process' was one of great trust and honour to herself as well as for me.

In the basket on the floor where large crystal trees and others, although slightly smaller with a variety of colours, were sitting on the very top shelf, however, Jannine did not see the trees at first, only the butterflies. I mainly saw the trees and not so much the butterflies. I could see as well as know where we were heading, but the process was 'soul travelling' through the stars, represented by the butterflies.

All the beautiful butterflies activating the higher consciousness with their beautiful colours began a shifting as well as a journey through several vibrational frequencies. Jannine, being a very starry being herself, travelling quickly and easily out of her physical body. Therefore, the first conscious assistance for her was returning Jannine just as quickly, anchoring her new vibration through her physical body and into the earth. Hence, the teaching and consciousness that was about to come through the trees!

Eventually, approximately five minutes later, Jannine connected with the trees in the basket and then noticed the smaller ones on the very top shelf. Consciously working over a period of five to ten minutes while standing in front of the cupboard, doors were opened thanks to the butterfly crystals. In the etheric CrystaLoveLight Body, that is exactly what these bodies are, pure Light & Love, birthing and anchoring as one! The confusion and an overwhelming sense is often an issue for the mental body! How to move this 'energy' is not only through the vibrational shifting, consciously working with the colours but the breath as well, even if I am the only one able to focus on working with it!

The butterfly is the doorkeeper for the consciousness in bringing through more fully the gift of the I Am Body in seeing the light in the starry realms. The soul travelling experience is part of the CrystaLoveLight Process which also includes the activation of these parts, who are then able to journey wherever they must to begin a re-patterning of the heart, then with the breath, the love and light both merge with the spirit.

There is a phrase that has been expressed by many souls, 'they are off with the fairies or on another planet'! My experience and understanding of the CrystaLoveLight Process is to bring these parts that are 'out there' and therefore separated from the I Am in, through the Heart of the Mother, through the stars, journeying through the water consciousness than into the earth. In the end, the butterfly is not only about seeing the light in the stars but also feeling, knowing and in particular for Jannine, hearing the LoveLight as well. In the Oneness of All That Is, the Love & the Light are not separate!

Crystal Tree

The tree consciousness for Jannine became a key, for as the leaves of the branches, in this case, the small crystals attached to the limbs in the top of the tree, all represent parts of the CrystaLoveLight or I Am Body. The butterfly is one of these small crystals, however, Jannine connected with several, all representing the vibrational frequencies as well as the multi-dimensional aspects of her soul.

The memory for her conscious butterfly part may have been held in the heart, spirit or both! The soul travelling experience was the beginning of a journey that would take her through inner worlds, starry, water and etheric inner earth realms where the spirit and heart would become one! However, it was not necessary to focus on all that we needed or wanted to know at that stage, it would continue to unfold in the days to come. There was still a crystal to be found and bought!

Through the consciousness of the tree, the 'energy' of these parts or small crystals which look like leaves, begin to travel down through the higher limbs and through the trunk of the tree. The physical body is the trunk, solid, strong and a conscious clear pathway for the re-connection with the Earth Mother, Gaia, through the roots, therefore, the Crystal Heart of the Mother!

The day before we were working in the crystal shop, I had taken Jannine to the beach following the ear candling session. However, before walking and swimming we spent time in the rainforest. An amazing space, a large hill, a headland which meets the ocean, right in suburbia! The highest point is a lookout which has a magnificent view to the south, as well as out to sea!

Many of the trees that came into Jannine's consciousness through this walk, especially as she had sat on the huge roots of one very large tree, now became a significant part of our journey in the Earth Crystal shop. While standing in front of the display of butterflies and trees in the cupboard, I reminded her of the size of these trees from the previous day's walk in the rainforest. In particular, the root system of one enormous tree in particular, where she sat for a few minutes on the first full day of the retreat.

The CrystaLoveLight Process

While I never fully understand, see, hear or know it all in the moment, what is fully coming to me, right back to the day when initially buying the flowers in the supermarket! I just go with the 'process' trusting that all will be revealed in due time! Or perhaps 'divine time'! Trying to work it out is just a mental exercise with the heart not necessarily being connected.

Why I was guided to buy flowers, prior to the Jannine's first day of a retreat, something I had never done before for other souls coming for a line-in retreat, is about channelling! The Gifts of the I Am, the knowing (wisdom and higher consciousness) as well as the feeling, (clair sentience), both activating deep within the subconscious, all that Jannine and myself would bring through in the days to follow.

The CrystaLoveLight Process began consciously for me in 2003 when I was living on a rural property. Through sacred sound as well as working with crystals, drawing codes and consciously connecting to all the wildlife animals that were coming into my space, these among other experiences became my deepest awakening. Some animals were seasonal so they would come on the odd occasion! However, others were around all the time and it was the bird life that often caught my attention due to their singing, or in the case of the crows, their squawking.

The amazing awareness came when I realised that a particular soul, whether a live-in retreat, or a session lasting just a few hours, would often bring a particular animal in my space that I had never seen before. Particularly birds and I would refer to the three bird books I had in my possession to find out more consciously what the possibly message was that would come through a higher conscious knowing!

Through the conscious activation of all that was etheric and physical, I birthed and anchored parts of my CrystaLoveLight Body. Soul Travelling through the starry spheres, portals or doorways began to open. Songlines, activated by sacred sound, speaking or singing the light language, also assisted me to connect through the water consciousness. All parts of my CrystaLoveLight or I Am Body, separate for so long, were returning through my physical body, into the earth. By travelling through the lei lines or meridians of the Earth Mother, Gaia, the multi-dimensional understanding is that the physical earth is not separate to the stories or memories held in the inner earth realms.

Day Three

The final day of the retreat arrived! Jannine and I began consciously working together at 6.30am with another soul travelling journey. However, the sleep or lack of, in Jannine's case was an indication that much was taking place in the subconscious. The first stage of the session was approximately two and a half hours, some of the time sitting in a comfortable chair, then laying on the sofa/lounge. Finally completing this stage of the journey, I asked Jannine to sit back in the comfortable chair with both feet firmly on the floor.

What then unfolded was a full channelled message for Jannine, revealing her core memory, to which she replied, as so many have said to me in previous sessions, "yes I knew that"! Why had it taken four years for Jannine and many other souls to be able to finally come to a place of being able to 'feel, hear, know and see'?

I understand the 'process' assists a soul not only reach the awakening and consciousness of the deep core memories, but further birth, then fully anchoring the I Am or CrystaLoveLight Body within a new dimension. If any part of me is not allowing the I Am to come through then there is no clear flow or channel if the mental, emotional, physical or other etheric bodies are shut.

While the emotional and mental bodies were necessary doors for Jannine to open, allowing the flow of LoveLight through all other bodies of the I Am, this also includes the other higher multi-dimensional bodies of the unicorn, spider and butterfly. Jannine's inability to feel like and eat some food was not possible at this stage of our journey on the last day. I knew that something else was coming and by laying her on the massage table I could assist the physical body with all that had come through the etheric.

The emotional and mental bodies were finally opened and the feminine was still coming. The I Am Body, coming into the 7th dimension and higher, holds the 'collective memories', therefore while my memories may seem personal, there is an aspect which is not separate to all I connect to consciously and not so conscious at times. The more conscious souls can be my partner (or ex partner), children, their partners, grandchildren and extended family, as well as friends, including those I assist within the framework of my work!

I sensed that Jannine's time on the massage table on this final day was going to be far shorter than the three hour session the previous day. The pain she felt the day before I too felt in my feet and as a channel have experienced much of the emotional pain as it moves through me. I not only see, know and hear their pain but I feel it intensely! Often an indication to me of just what has been held for so long, years in fact!

The intense pain held in her body finally came through my left foot. My primary gifts of feeling, clairsentience indicated to me the intensity of the pain Jannine and others are holding in their physical as well their etheric bodies. By the time I had completed the work with Jannine, mostly through the physical hands on work, all was channelling through me and am often directed, through feeling to sit in a chair. A strong sense at times of being thrust into sitting! All the time needing to take a breath while focusing on the Light, channelling, not only what I feel, but what else may come through my knowing, seeing and hearing!

The final morning's full channel for Jannine brought tears through me that lasted a couple of minutes. A very physical indication of the huge release through her emotional body but with no sense of being overwhelmed or caught up in the drama as this door opened. All taking place as I sat in the chair brining through the information she was ready to hear! While I have shed tears in the past as the doors have opened for souls I am assisting, this was the most intense and similar to opening doors of or flood gates of a huge dam.

My gift as a Channel for the Council of Light, birthed and anchored over the years of inner work in creating the CrystaLoveLight Process, enables me, consciously not holding onto any part of the memory that is being worked through and with another soul. Through my I Am Body, mostly conscious in my physical body, my own inner work has been with re-patterning many heart and spirit memories. These have been held in me, not only in relation to the Earth Mother, but through the Oneness of All That Is.

Being able to channel a 'process' which assists a soul journey consciously through the Creation Web of CrystaLoveLight and re-connect, re-pattern, then finally birth the I Am Body in the dimension that the soul possibly can, is an awakening for myself and others of the memory of all memories, 'the separation story'. By Soul Travelling, I am able to remember the Gifts of the I Am which have held all stories or memories relating to any issue regarding the 'separation of the heart, spirit, soul, I Am Body, The Mother and the Oneness of All That Is!

The conscious connection with and through "The Mother" is very much the CrystaLoveLight Process. She is not only of the earth for all those shamans and earth mothers! Nor is she just of the water for all those who hold a very close connection with the whales and dolphins, but she is The Weaver of the Web of Light that connects and flows through all three. Remembering in particular the gifts of being able see, hear, know and feel the power of the Light! Therefore, needing to soul travel to the core of my being where I birthed through as pure Light!

Home Coming

So many souls on this planet, myself included prior to this work, struggle to find their place on the earth, with no sense that earth is a place to call 'home', often spending a great deal of time and money trying to work out why. Lost, not sure if I wanted to stay in the teaching profession and not knowing where I wanted to live! Led me to buying an 'around the world' ticket in 1998! I took time off from work for the first time after decades in full time education with university studies on top of it all and began a huge journey, leaving Australia for six months. At the time I thought those months were to be journey of my life, the big one was yet to reveal itself!

The activations over the days, shifting through several vibrational frequencies more than once and the dimension in which Jannine's deepest core memory was sitting over the previous months and possibly four years, was awakening more fully as we travelled. The intense focus over a three day period allowed her soul to "go where it needed" so that her heart and spirit could truly, come 'home together', as One! Those who have travelled with me over three or more days find the retreat experience intense but a necessary 'rite of passage'. Jannine's emotional body was unlocked due to the mental body also finally 'letting go'! With one blocked the other doors cannot open! With only one gift working, the machine is functioning on three cylinders. The potential that we all hold is four, plus the gift of being a clear channel follows.

The Collective Conscious

Finally we had some food then prepared to go for a drive to view a lottery home and buy a ticket or two. Part of this conscious final journey together was allowing her to begin integrating, away from the CrystaLoveLight Retreat Centre, where much activation is constant. Integrating has many levels to move through, over days, through weeks and even months. The initial time is significant due to the inability of the soul to hold the LoveLight vibration, so while still on retreat and in my physical company, this part of the 'process' assisted Jannine before she actually left to return home, a three hour drive north.

Once before Jannine and I had visited a home, working together with the energy of the space. Now here we were yet again, walking up the long drive from the road to the home. My legs become very heavy and so did Jannine's so we needed to stop. This has happened before and I know that the trees have a message and in getting my attention, our work had well and truly begun consciously! What was to unfold was not only the conscious work continuing, for we were to discover the retreat was far from ended. The bizarre and almost disbelieving confirmation in relation to the past three days was about to be revealed.

We ended the walk up the drive and I sat on the stone wall, allowing the energy to move through me as we connected with the 'collective conscious' story. The knowing for me was in the earth under the house and Jannine could see bars, a sense that souls were trapped. As we approached the home, walking through the ticket selling area, a double garage, I began to see an etheric door, like a vault. Many people visiting, dreaming of a 'new home' as they looked and bought tickets, were consciously and subconsciously bringing with them their fears and beliefs that they 'were trapped'.

All that Jannine and I had journeyed through over the days was about 'The Mother'! Her final stages on the massage table brought through the collective consciousness of many friends who have not birthed children in this lifetime, including myself. The memory held deep in the core of numerous women, mostly held in the subconscious, is 'that they cannot be mothers in this lifetime'. Connecting too, birthing and anchoring our gifts through the CrystaLoveLight Process is not just about conceiving and birthing a baby in the physical but remembering the Gifts of the I Am.

The picture and story of the 'collective' is much bigger and women in many cultures and traditions, including royalty, regarding women as worthy and honoured only if they take responsibility of providing an heir. Shamanic cultures, even within religious traditions, woman would have been considered cursed by the gods or God if unable to bear a child or two. While sitting in a channelled group session with my second teacher and mentor, I heard the words specifically addressed to me, 'spiritual midwife'. Over the years it has not been just an etheric birthing but a full on and at times overwhelming experience of energy through the I Am Body. In particular the physical body connecting me to the Heart of the Mother! The "Oneness" is in every part of me, the I Am or CrystaLoveLight Body, a connection through the water, starry consciousness and therefore All That Is!

Soul Travelling the Light Pathways, the Creation Web of CrystaLoveLight! Activating, remembering, re-patterning, embracing both the Love and the Light, then returning to the Crystal Heart of the I Am. A coming home, fully through this incarnated lifetime and all that my soul holds. The key for manifesting through the Gifts of the I Am on the earth in this lifetime as they assist in knowing, seeing, hearing and feeling the full potential of LoveLight as my mission unfolds! Finding my home on the earth is the journey of a lifetime and the levels of understanding the memory of being 'lost, homeless, depressed and angry' with The Mother, therefore not wanting to on the earth', whether conscious or not, is very real for many souls.

As Jannine and I began walking towards the house, I said to her, 'this is your house'! Not a generous gesture on my part but a channelled phrase that would in a very short time confirm all that would imply all layers necessary for her to 'find her home' on the earth. While we did not manage to manifest this physical home, all a necessary part of the 'process' in doing the work required at the time!

The confirmation came that our days together had been a profound time when Jannine showed me the goose bubs on her arm. What caused this buzzing feeling in her was the first large picture of flowers on the wall. She said, "this is what I have been seeing for the past three days" as well in every room, the bed spreads, the pictures on the wall all held a butterfly theme. Some were larger than life and stuck to the walls. The flowers had the same gold colour as the ones I had bought for my space on the first day of the retreat.

A display book sitting in the main bedroom was titled "Australian Voices" and on the wall in one of the bedrooms were not only butterflies but a picture of nine wrens or robins. Finding your voice, through Sacred Sound Codes was a significant issue for Jannine and many others with whom I work in unlocking the throat area. So very necessary if one is able to connect the mental body with the heart, allowing both etheric and physical vibrations, then pass through the 'truck of the tree' into the earth.

Our soul travelling journey unfolded as we walked through the house! I began to feel the vibrational shifting within myself, apparent when I was standing in front of another very large picture on the wall. A tree with several colours throughout and began immediately to soul travel through the colours, shifting yet again my vibration. Within a minute or so, I saw the energy come through the tree and travel around the house. I walked into the large kitchen and living area which extended out to the pool.

Standing outside and feeling that I wanted to go onto the grass, however, a fence indicated that no one could walk beyond the barrier. I began working and felt the energy so strongly and eventually walked back near the main front door of the house. If coming through the front door one could go left to the bedroom area or to the right into the kitchen and living area. If one continued straight ahead from the front door, you would arrive at the main gate, the entrance into the pool itself.

Again I could not enter through this gate as it was locked for safety reasons so stood for another good ten minutes holding the space while watching the portal open in the pool. Jannine told me while standing there that she had on past occasions drawn the design of her home that had a pool in the middle and the house built around it, just as this one displayed. Hence, my words to her which reiterated what I had said on the way in, "this is your home"!

Physically, Jannine and I could not walk into the area of the pool so etherically I saw that we were both holding the space. Jannine was standing in one corner of the pool and I in the other. I felt my energy through my physical body lighten and began to walk back into the double garage where we could buy our tickets. However, walking past the main bedroom for the last time, I saw in the centre of the room a pillar of light and stood in it, then asked Jannine to do the same.

The lesson, as it had come through the Earth Crystal shop was to be conscious of travelling out, but also to come back, anchor and ground it all. Following this Jannine looked again at the book "Australian Voices" and asked me what year I was born, when I said, 1953, another woman who overheard her asked me to repeat it and I immediately said, the Year of the Snake! With this came the consciousness of Mother Gaia and I said "where is she"?

Sleeping in the earth right under my feet and as we worked with the consciousness of her message for Jannine, The Mother moved to take the shape of the large rock wall at the back of the property. Sandstone blocks which had a similar pattern to the skin marking on the python snake. Our journey had come to an end…..for now!

Remembering The Gifts of The I Am - CrystaLoveLight Body

Walk gently and slowly among the flowers
seeing and knowing their beauty in light ……

Walk gently and slowly among the flowers
feeling and hearing their breath in fragrances of love…

Walk gently and slowly among the flowers
remembering where they birthed……

By walking gently and slowly among the flowers
I honour The Mother beneath and within…..

The Oneness is All That I Am & All That Is!



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